My worrying or "struggling with God" about it isn't going to influence the outcome one iota. I know this. My head knows this. But my heart...
Yeah...this emotional girl wants to hold onto this one and mull over every What-If scenario I can dream up. So I ponder...wonder...fret...and then find myself feeling frustrated...helpless...and a bit overwhelmed.
I know in my heart of hearts...deep down in my soul...that God has got this. He's figured it all out. It's already handled. All I have to do is wait. Apparently a really really really long time.
And the fun part? Our family has been down this exact road before. Just a couple of years ago we had to wait for an answer almost six months past when were told we would get that answer.
And now here we are in the same boat again. And I am not excited to be in this boat. I'm not even that fond of boats to begin with....
When I woke up this morning with all of this on my mind, I didn't feel too joyful and was struggling to find my Rosie Outlook in all of it.
But...you know...I'm really trying to stick with my goal that it's not about me, so I decided to focus on others today. I posted on my Facebook page that I would be spending extra time in prayer this afternoon and if anyone would like prayer to please send me a message. I also added that I would pray for anyone that liked my post as well.
Oh my! What a blessing that turned out to be! I ended up with over 30 people to pray for and the requests are still coming in (and I will pray for each one of them). You know it's hard to feel too sorry for yourself when you are praying over other people and their concerns. It was just the refocus I needed today.
Not only that, but a couple of people even offered to pray for me in response to me saying I would pray for them. It blessed me. I felt loved. It reminded me of something Jesus' brother James wrote in his letter to the believers in Jerusalem. In James 5:16 he wrote:
Therefore confess your sins to each other and pray for each other.
So I wrote each name and request in my Prayer Book, lifting each name to Jesus as I wrote them down. It is my hope that each person felt peace and the blessing of God upon them today.
I don't know for sure how long this wait will be...several months as least...maybe more. I'm sure in that amount of time there will be other days of wondering and worrying, but when the emotions take over, I'm going to take the focus off of me and pray for others.
Praying for one another is one of the most loving acts we can do. It's a special way to Celebrate Love. And really... I can't think of a better way to survive the long wait...or end this month of Celebrating Love, than by praying for someone.